Cloth Diapers

I bought cloth diapers last week. Yes, you read the last post correctly, we are not pregnant...but let me explain!

I've had a bit of an obsession with cloth diapers for a long time. They are so cute! Not to mention their
financial and environmental benefits. I've been reading, and researching and talking to other cloth diaper users for a while now. I knew when the time came we were going to use cloth diapers for our baby. I knew which cloth diapers we were going to use. I "liked" the cloth diaper company on facebook. I read their blog.  Last Monday (Earth Day) something happened. They marked the diaper packs on sale ($10.00 off each pack!) They offered free disposable inserts, they offered free shipping. All of this on the diapers I thought we should use. I told Ali to tell me not to buy them. She didn't. She pointed to colors she liked. So I did it! No regrets.

I'm hoping our baby will be slightly less furry...but you get the idea!

Two Rounds Are Better Than One

We are officially not pregnant. Based on the timing of when the next cycle started it seems like the first iui did not occur at the right time. It's slightly frustrating because we paid all of that money, and told them we didn't think it was the right time, and they told us to go get inseminated anyway. Oh well, we learned to be slightly more cautious of the Ovulation Predictor Kit, when not paired with all the other symptoms she usually experiences. It's also a bit of a relief that it seems likely that the timing was off. It makes us think that there was nothing really wrong, it was just that we didn't inseminate on the right day.

On to round two. It's a bit hard to get excited about round two. Last month everything was new, and we were full of hope, it's amazing how just one failed cycle can make you a little skeptical about the whole process. Though, in a way it's less stressful this way. We're not counting everyday like we were last month, we're just sort of living life knowing that in a couple weeks we'll start testing again, but it's not occupying everything we are doing.

On the plus side: this means we will not have a Christmas baby. Everyone I know who has a December birthday complains about it.....glad we dodged that one ;-)

On the not-so-plus side: We are headed to Tennessee for a few days right at the start of when we might possibly need to inseminate. I REALLY hope we don't miss the window.

In other news: In my brain, since before we even bought sperm, we would get pregnant on the second try. Sometimes my brain is right. I hope it is this time!

Pre-Baby Babymoon

Apparently all the cool kids are taking "Babymoons." I hadn't heard the phrase until a couple of months ago when several of my friends declared they were going on one. Basically the idea is to get one big hoorah in before your baby comes. I chance to relax, and be together. Sounds great to me!!

For Christmas we got a gift certificate to this incredible inn only a couple hours from our house, that we had been to before and LOVED. We planned to take our trip over Patriot's Day, because we had an extra day off of work, and it was supposed to be right before our first iui. Well, plans changed and we decided to do our iui in March (which became the start of April) which meant our adventure fell right in the middle of our (dreaded) two week wait.

Can I just say it was amazing! We have filed it away as one of the best weekends ever.

We got there just in time for afternoon tea.  They put out five different kinds of fresh baked cookies and tea.
The napped on the king sized bed with like 8000 count sheets.
Then we ate some more.
Then we put in a movie and snuggled by the fire until it was time to go back to sleep.

They had a two course breakfast everyday. (Pictured, banana cream french toast, cumin bacon and fruit, this was the second course. The first course was baked pears on lemon poppyseed bread, with lemon and raspberry sauce...yum.)
We wandered around to the shops and bought yummy cheese and veggies for lunch.
Then we had cookies, tea, and a nap.
Then we had a five course dinner which was a very delicious adventure. Seriously gourmet foods that we would probably never cook or eat. We had no choice over the menu, but it was fantastic.

On Monday after we checked out we went on a hike up Maiden's cliff. It was the perfect Spring day for a hike.

Did I mention there was a jacuzzi tub?

Everything about this adventure was amazing and relaxing. We didn't have to worry about cooking, or cleaning, or working. We just enjoyed each other's company, and got lots of sleep. Any talk of the hopeful pregnancy was not filled with anxiety but excitement that someday we'll get to share so many awesome things with a tiny human. It was magical.

The Ride Continues

The first few days after the iui were unpleasant at best, and torturous at worst. The internet became our worst enemy as we googled everything that might possibly be happening to Ali's body. I have become fairly certain that any internet search can (and does) yield in the full spectrum of possible explanations for a particular symptom. Each time we searched something we got everything from "You are definitely pregnant, even though that's not even possible yet" to "you have a serious infection and will probably never make a baby because of the horrible bacteria eating your girl parts." Yeah, that was fun.

Personally, I spent the day after the iui in complete doubt. I didn't really think about it, I didn't google anything, I just figured it didn't work. By Tuesday I had some hope. Unfortunately, the hope was accompanied by some signs that Ali might be ovulating (for the first time? again?) ....which would be really bad considering that we had inseminated days ago (and frozen sperm doesn't seem to last that long). There were tears. Luckily, it was also free cone day at Ben and Jerry's, which doesn't solve anything but is delicious.

By the time Wednesday rolled around it had been several days since either of us had gotten a full nights sleep. We were exhausted, and worried, and sad, and 1000 other emotions all at the same time. We e-mailed the coordinator of the AI program at the clinic to ask her if we should start testing again, and maybe inseminate again this month if it seemed the time was right. This is something that we had previously decided we weren't going to do mostly because of the money, and the fact that we really only have 3 shots at this before we run out of money. To use two of them in the same month seemed like a bad idea....until it seemed like a good idea. I headed to work and Ali decided to take another ovulation test, and it came back positive. She called me at work crying. There's really no reason why she should have gotten 2 positive ovulation test 4 days apart. Which made us think that we had definitely inseminated at the wrong time. We were pretty devastated.

Luckily the woman from the clinic called. She basically said that they have no idea why the ovulation tests were positive so far apart. It does not mean that Sunday was the wrong day to inseminate. She recommended some stress relieving techniques, including NOT testing anymore (and definitely not inseminating again this month) and also not taking Ali's temperature in the morning. She also recommended that we use next month to gather information, and not inseminate. We may just ignore that last little bit of advice because we've spent the last 6 months gathering information and the information that we have is that every cycle is pretty different. We will however, be more cautious about when we choose to inseminate, based on the symptoms that she is exhibiting at the time of the positive ovulation test.

Strangely, that conversation made us feel better. We knew that we could go through the next couple of weeks without any tests, or thermometers. Ali had been taking her temperature super early every morning since October and charting it. She was worried about what her temperature would do after the insemination which led to some insomnia. Once she agreed to not take it for at least the rest of this cycle  she (and I) both went back to sleeping through the night. That in itself was an amazing gift.

Our friends have been incredible, calling, dropping by, letting us show up uninvited to their homes. I know some people are reluctant to share the details of this process with people, but I think its totally awesome to be surrounded by people who are cheering us on.