Something to be Proud Of

Several years ago, when I had first moved to this city, I was waiting at a bus stop near my house with my teenage sister, waiting for the bus to take us to the mall. We were on our way to a volunteer at a summer camp for kids with life threatening illnesses, and my sister had forgot her bathing suit. We were in a hurry, and the bus was late.

Before too long the street was blocked off by police officers. I was more intrigued than worried. Within 15 minutes we realized that there was a parade happening, and we were going to see it. Turns out it was the Pride parade. We were from a pretty liberal tiny city, but we didn't know such a thing existed. It seemed fun and festive, we collected some beads and some candy. And then, one of the people in the parade waved at us and shouted "HEEELLLLLOOOOO FELLOW HOMOS!" My sister found it hysterical. I was mortified, and suddenly wished I could be anywhere else in the world.

No doubt it was my inner turmoil that brought me down at that point, I was kind of/sort of involved with one of my best friends from college. A girl. I hadn't told anyone, and it was messy. It was confusing. At that point it hurt more than it felt good. She had a boyfriend. I wasn't gay.

Fast-forward 7 years (!). I am very happily married to an incredible woman. I have successfully avoided the Pride Festival since that day with my sister. At times I find my own lack of enthusiasm regarding PRIDE and embarrassment to my people. I really saw my "coming out" as a non-event. It was declaration of love for a person (who happened to be the same gender as I am) but not much more. It didn't change my clothing choices, or my taste in music, or my desire to go to the Pride Parade. I had friends, I had community, I didn't need to see mostly naked men (or women) dancing on top of trucks in order to be sure of who I was, and who I loved.

BUT, our church is on the parade route, and our friend Tad was planning to stand outside and hand out bubbles, and lollipops and buttons with an important message: "You are Loved." So we semi-reluctantly agreed to go help out. We got to the church  early to decorate with rainbow kites and various whirly gigs. We brought out bright colored fabric, and rainbow umbrellas. We wore leis and I whipped out my rainbow wig.

When the parade started we decided to go out into the street and give our trinkets to the people marching in the parade. They were happy to get fun toys, and candy, but extra excited for the buttons. I gave a button to a teenager who took it from my hand and said with joy, "That's right, I AM loved. Take that parents." While it's heart breaking that this young person does not feel loved by his parents because of his orientation (I assume), I am encouraged by the thought that on this day he knew that he was worthy of love, even if it was in the form of a button from a complete stranger.


I didn't think I wanted or needed the "gay community." However,  it was pretty powerful seeing the parade and realizing how lucky we are to live in a place where restaurants, jewelers, banks, churches, and even the animal shelter would march in a parade that says that all love is valued, honored, and celebrated. The mayor and the police chief served as marshalls in the parade, riding in cars and waving to the parade goers. To me this is incredible. Because of this one day celebration young gay kids (and old gay kids) can see that there are places in this city where they are safe and valued....and that's something to be proud of.